Weirdon’ts

Today morning while I was about to cross the road I saw a minor accident and for a change I was not involved. A car, not flashy – basic i10, wanted to turn left and the roads were quite busy. It tried to move forward and as the person saw vehicles coming at high speed from front, he hit a reverse of couple of centimeters and Crash!!! A guy on cycle was hit by the car and he dropped his cycle and started shouting on the guy. The guy lowered his windows, saw through his Ray-Ban type looking aviator glasses calmly conversed with him. The guy still being very aggressive. By the time I’ve crossed the road and inspected his cycle from far. The cycle was fine, and even after the fall nothing had happened to it. The guy was pointing to his feet and said “you hit me” (probably, that was in Tamil). Now whose fault is it? The guy on cycle who was way too close or the guy in car who didn’t see before doing a reverse?

If you live close to someone, then either you’ll miss the finest details or you see them. In case of emotional attachment first one holds true. But fortunately I’m having a gold plated “Single” tag hanging over my head and not being of the emotional Gestapo helps me being the second kind. I’m staying with 4 guys, thanks to the hostile environment my organization has put me in. There is the topic of discussion today on Weirdon’ts.

Let’s start with the least weirdest of all. He has nothing special or nothing weird, but that will be understatement if you need to tell that time spent in beautifying, which includes bathing, is about 1 and half to 2 hours :roll:. Now that’s someone personal choice how much heshe needs to admire own body. Now coming to weirdest part, it’s claimed by him that if someone needs to leave (for office in general) at the same time his time they should go earlier or later. Now how is that possible? Just imagine just to reach your office on time you are taking your bath before 1 and half hour :-o.

Humans evolved from apes but I’ve found someone who evolved from “housefly”. I’m not referring to Jeff Goldblum (The Fly), but someone with habits as cool as housefly. Oh… the guy is not found in dirty places he’s quite clean or rather cleanliness freak. If you observe houseflies, they are generally wiping their feet and wings as if to keep themselves clean. This person I’m referring to is the one who’ll walk around and abruptly go wash his hands and feet. Well that’s OK, you should be clean, but think about this, you are idle reading newspaper and all of a sudden go to wash your hands and again back to newspaper. After sometime newspaper reading is over, then again back to wash hands :shock:. This guy reminds me of my great-grand mother, who did this religiously, she’ll walk from one end of the house to other (to see if her clothes have dried and no bird has s(h)it on it) and then wash her feet and hands, because she held the door handle.

Since childhood we are trained to take care of our money and save resources. In this world when resources are going scarce and costly it’s the best practice. Chennai being costly, in terms of food (North-Indian: simple chapatti costs 10+ while Dosa and Idli the same price available all over India :eek:, it was supposed to be cheap here) and travel exorbitantly tiresome (thanks to people travelling all the time and traffic 30 minutes journey can take an hour or more). A wonderful guy I met, he’s also like the cleanliness freak above but doesn’t wash his hands and feet just like that. He saves money by travelling in local buses (in grueling heat and jostle of people to save that 50% of the amount he might have spent on company bus). Company bus is comfort so it’s dearer while local bus being physically tiring are cheap. Of course the reason is money, but how about if you hear the reason as, company buses will stick to timing and by local bus he can leave any time. Company bus have a frequency of 15-30 minutes at peak times. Now as the beautiful nature of cleanliness was concerned, we Indians tend to wear the same cloth maximum twice (if they are not soiled or sweatystinky), while in cold countries the number is always on the higher side and warmer countries should be rather be under AC. But this guy will drop his clothing after 1 wear even if the office is AC and trousershirt is of dark color. Thanks to washing machine which runs 3-4 times weekly only for this guy else he’ll be having morning to evening cloth washing session on weekends.

For some people, you’ve no words to describe. They are the epitome of everything. You can learn what not to do very effectively. If you blame someone that you’ve not worked on something couple of days, he won’t account you for the other days he had worked but rather will fall onto the day you wrongly said :lol:. If I gonna fill in his details it’ll be me bringing out my wrath on him (I was filling this post for 1 week now… no post last week and all of a sudden had a verbal duel with him yesterday). But who can stop the truth ;-). You spend a fortune on your dream machine and then when problem is detected on the very day you got it, how long will you wait? This friend of mine has waited for nearly 2 months. That’s not all, this dear friend of mine asked for a week off, had some of his relatives wedding. He went home and returned without attending the marriage, reason was he’ll be bored at his relatives place. And to all our surprise he went office for 2 days and rest 2 days he slept at home (which doesn’t include the following 2-day weekend). Lot’s more to tell but I guess it’s time for next one.

This guy is the most brilliant of the lot, sleeps at almost at night 3 ‘o clock daily and is awake by 8 ‘o clock. Any day he sleeps early is a surprise to all of us. He’ll be generally in his place, skooting in front of his system and sometimes with his headphones on. He’ll occasionally get off from his place and will go rounds and back to square one, don’t you think this guy is some school principal (which has nothing to do and nothing to get except the slangs at his back). Even when asleep, sometimes he can tell what people talked, kinda very scary but the scarier part is he can even hear what people are talking in other room with his headphones on (no music playing, adjacent room should be 11-feet long and 8-feet wide to facilitate echo and should share common door with his room – oh that room was the common room). He’ll complain on everything, argue on every second topic, ready for verbal duel any time and behaves as “I know everything”. He may be correct, which I personally feel is most of the times, but get highly irritated if the opposite person doesn’t listen. Such kinda people are really weird, considering others as inferior to themselves is a sin because everyone is created equal.

There are more such weirdo(n’t)s seen all around us. It’s us who have to take a note and understand what we shouldn’t do. Oh! by the way, the last person was me.

Author: Sabyasachi "SAM" Mohapatra

Sabyasachi Mohapatra the author, editor and owner (this place is for bragging, right?) of ZeroneA. He has varied interests not limited to technology, movies, music, social & political, photography and travel. Software Engineer by education and when not writing (which includes majority of time), he works as software developer to support his ever growing needs & demands. Apart from that, he prefers to daydream and sleep. Do you count Computer Games, watching movies and listening to music? Then there are of course browsing and reading (random things on the internet - just like this one!) You can catch more about him on Facebook , Twitter & Google+.

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